Ups and downs...

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do."

"Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live."

I went with two quotes that address how I am and have been feeling today. Let's deal with the crap first. I've been talking with a lot of people about what I am going to do with my house so that has been a very somber cloud hanging over my head. Deep down, the uncertainty of potential financial ramifications and penalties really wears on me because I have always tried to be frugal with money and conservative with how I approach spending it. Now in a matter a weeks, it seems like all that could be for naught. Oh well, like the quotes above say, I need to embrace those fears, doubts and uncertainties as a man and work through them. I told my ex that I would spend the rest of my life proving her wrong when she doubted I could ever be a real man so what better chance to begin than now? It would all just be empty words if I bowed to this now. I will always view being told that by the one I loved as a true watershed moment in my life. Words that I will be so much better off for dispelling. :)

On to the good stuff because it is much more fun to talk about and puts me in a better mood....
I should be booking my flight to Barcelona, Spain tomorrow!

If all goes as planned, I will be leaving April 9th and returning April 17th. I really have no plans other than to meet one of my best friends, Kyle Clift at the airport when I arrive. The two of us in Spain/anywhere else in Europe that our travels might take us is an awesome thought. It's strange to think that I have never really allowed myself to travel before. Looking back, I think it was more of a 'don't want to get out of my comfort zone' feeling more than anything else. However, there is no better time than the present to break those old stereotypes about myself.

Lastly, I am now fully certified to begin my hospice work which is a really cool feeling. All I am waiting on now is the first call/email saying there is a patient requesting company. Just being in the room sharing experiences with the social worker already makes me excited to start helping in any possible way. My journey to being a better friend, family member and overall human being is just beginning.

Thanks again for reading....

Cheers to new beginnings,

Justin